MOB WIVES

THIS KILLS ME!
It looks SO AMAZING! These women make me look boring and normal! WOW

Get More: Mob Wives (Season 2)

MY NEW LOOK!!

JUST KIDDING THATS CHERRY PIE!

I am thinking seriously envious of this man for being able to PULL OF SO GREATLY, this look!

I must admit I found this on a buddies facebook page and became completely inspired! I feel like I need something similar! Handsome and OUTRAGEOUS all at once. Well done!! I wish I could find this man and date him!

LINDSAY LOHANS LEAKED PLAYBOY PICS

I think Lindsay looks AMAZING!!
WHAT DO YOU THINK??

Recepies

Ranch Crusted Chicken

Last night I made an AMAZING ranch crusted chicken breast!

Ranch Crusted Chicken

8 chicken Breasts

3/4 C. Italian Seasoned PANKO Bread Crumbs

3/4 C. Shredded Parmesan Cheese

1/2 C. melted butter

1 Packet Hidden Valley Ranch Dressing Mix

Preheat oven to 350.

Mix together corn flakes, cheese and ranch mix in a medium size bowl and set aside.

In a separate bowl melt butter.

Dip chicken breasts in melted butter then into dry mixture.

Place in greased baking dish and cook, uncovered for 45 minutes!

I always make a packet of the dressing with some sour cream and a few table spoons of KRAFT mayo t0 drizzle over the finished product!

SUPER YUMMY!!!!

VEGAN LENTIL SOUP! 1 bag of lentils 3 table spoons of olive oil 4 carrots 2 Boxes of vegetable broth 1 large onion 4 cloves of garlic 3 potatoes  2 bay leaves Cumin Garam Masala (a spice u can get in the grocery store!) salt  pepper 

Soak the lentils in a bowl of water the night before or for at leas 4 hours. (use HALF of a bag if you like BROTHY soup. If you want a thicker type "stew" use the ENTIRE bag.) 

In a large pot pour olive oil. add onion chopped and saute until translucent. then add 4 finely chopped cloves of garlic saute but do not brown it. add one teaspoon of cumin and 1/4 teaspoon of Garam Masala and black pepper and bay leaves chopped carrots and peeled and cubed potatoes (DO NOT ADD SALT. lentils cook better if you dont salt them until the end.)  pour in 2 boxes of Vegetable broth and bring to boil. Drain lentils that have been soaked over night and lentils to boiling broth and veggies. Simmer for about 45 minutes to an hour until tender. Remove bay leaves. Add Salt to taste after about 40 minutes about  

I make a fresh pot of soup every monday and it lasts all week! You can boil elbow noodles and keep them on the side in the fridge and add them to a bowl of soup to make it more filling! (don't keep the noodles in the soup or it will absorb the liquid)

Delish Spinach-N-Artichoke dip is hands down the BEST party favor I have EVER contributed.  I swear this dip is REDONKITY-DOO-DAH-DAYUM good..... I swear I've seen Dan Caster eat 5lbs of it in ONE sitting. And again, its NOT the recipe for YSL Rive Gauche fragrance. Im pretty sure if you FOLLOW the directions you can handle it.

Jasen’s Famous Spinach Artichoke Dip 1 Package of Dry Onion Soup Mix 1 Bar of Cream Cheese 2 Packages of Frozen CHOPPED Spinach 2 Cans of Artichoke Hearts (quartered makes it easier) I Cup of Grated Parmesean Cheese 1 Cup of Grated Asiago Cheese 1/2 Cup of Romano Cheese (optional) 2 cups of Mayonase 1/2 Cup of Sour Cream 1 Teaspoon Garlic Powder Directions: Defrost, Drain and Squeeze water out of Spinach. Drain Artichoke Hearts and chop into large pieces. Set Aside. Present Oven to 350 In a large bowl add Cream Cheese, Mayo, Sour Cream, Shredded Cheese's (aside from Romano. Keep that for the top) Add Onion Soup Mix and Garlic Powder and mix well. Then fold in Spinach and Artichokes. In a large Casserole dish add ingredients and sprinkle romano cheese on top. (You can add fresh ground pepper to taste, I know you love it) Bake until bubbley and edges are golden. Serve with fresh toasted pita bread and enjoy!

Jasen's Famous Truffle Mac N Cheese 

This shit will not only knock your socks off, but if you are looking to receive oral sex, or are trying to make someone fall in love with you,  Jasen's truffle mac-n-cheese will be your KRYPTONITE. Now, I am not trying to act like I invented truffle mac-n-cheese but I sure as hell perfected it! And listen, you dont have to be a god damn culinary graduate, or hard core cook to pull this off! Trust me. I always say to remember ONE important thing! YOU WAN'T TO EAT THIS FOOD! Flavor it with your TASTE BUDS, if you add something you like the food will taste right. Do what the recipe says... DONT FUCK IT UP. ; )

Jasen’s Truffle Mac-n-Cheese 2 Cups uncooked Elbow Macaroni (one box) 4 Tablespoons Butter 1 Cup grated sharp cheddar cheese 1 Cup Grier cheese 1 Cup Velveta cheese 2 Eggs 1/2 cup Sour Cream 1 (10 3/4ounce) can Campbells Cheese Soup Mix 1/2 Teaspoon of salt (if you have truffle salt use that) 1 Cup whole milk 1/2 teaspoon dry mustard 1/2 teaspoon black pepper 1/2 teaspoon onion powder TO MAKE TRUFFLE 1 teaspoon Truffle Oil 1 cup panko bread crumbs Directions: 1. Boil Elbow macaroni in salted water for 5 minutes. Drain, DO NOT RINSE In medium saucepan, mix butter, cheese, soup until melted In large bowl mix eggs, sour cream, salt, milk, dry mustard, pepper and truffle oil. after ingredients are mixed add macaroni  stir again. *(Before adding breadcrumbs drizzle top with 1stp of truffle oil and stir) Pour into large cassarole dish and bake for 30 mins on 350. OR crock pot on low for 45 minutes 5. In a nonstick skillet add 3 tablespoons of butter until melted. Toast Panko Breadcrumbs lightly (sprinkle on  top of macaroni and cheese after baked) *(if making truffle add one teaspoon of truffle oil to toast with buttter) ENJOY!

VEGAN "Bacon "Chicken" "Cheddar" "Ranch" Wrap  Chop Fresh Dill, Parsley (about a hand full of each), and i shave 2 or 3 carrots and then cut them up. Use 3 Cups of  VEGANAISE add garlic powder about 1 teaspoon and 1 teaspoon of onion powder then squeeze one lemon and mix it up. (I always buy 2 jars because you can use one as MAYO and one as Ranch dressing, it stays nice if you make it and you can just leave it in the jar.  Buy Morning Star farms Chicken patty's and Boca Spicy Chic Pattys. They are DELICIOUS! also the Morning star farms "Bacon" is TO DIE FOR.  I put them both in the oven together and then when the bacon comes out of the oven I let it sit for a few minutes and let the chicken patty keep cooking, then on a pita or WHOLE GRAIN wrap, i crunch up 3 strips of the bacon sprinkle DAYIA "Cheddar Cheese" 2 pieces of romaine lettuce then i cut the chicken patty up into strips and use my "Ranch" dressing. it makes the best lunch!! You can make it in the morning and wrap it up in foil and it stays nice until you're ready to eat lunch!!

Cashew Cream Recipe 

Cashew Cream is a vegan-chef staple that stands in for dairy in a variety of ways. In the raw-food world, where it originated, it’s used in lots of desserts. When you cook with it, though, it can be so much more—from cheese filling in ravioli to heavy cream in soups. It can be stored 2 to 3 days in the refrigerator and can be frozen for up to 6 months (although after it’s defrosted it can be a bit lumpy, so it’s good to give it a spin in the blender to smooth it out before using it).

The trick when making cashew cream is to use raw cashews. They have no flavor of their own; they’re just a vessel for fat and creaminess. (It’s the roasting that brings out the familiar sweetness in cashews.) Because it has a nice fat content, cashew cream reduces in a pan even faster than heavy cream. (Soy milk, which some people use in vegan cooking, has no fat, so it doesn’t reduce into a thick sauce—it’s really not an alternative.)

For different applications, there are different consistencies—thick and regular. (I’ve also included a recipe for Whipped Cashew Cream, which is a great accompaniment to desserts.) Both are easy to make but not quick, because the cashews need to soak overnight. A shortcut is to put the cashews in a pot with water, bring them to a boil, then shut off the heat and let them soak for an hour. But this starts to leach out the sweetness, so you’re better off with the overnight method. Also, there’s at least one decent brand of store-bought nut cream, called Mimic Cream, which combines cashews and almonds; you can usually find it on the shelves or in the refrigerated section near the soy milk. Of course, nothing compares to homemade, and once you get used to it, there may be no turning back. regular and thick cashew cream 2 cups whole raw cashews (not pieces, which are often dry), rinsed very well under cold water Put the cashews in a bowl and add cold water to cover them. Cover the bowl and refrigerate overnight. Drain the cashews and rinse under cold water. Place them in a blender with enough fresh cold water to cover them by 1 inch. Blend on high for several minutes until very smooth. (If you’re not using a professional high-speed blender such as a Vita-Mix, which creates an ultra-smooth cream, strain the cashew cream through a fine-mesh sieve.) To make thick cashew cream, which some of the recipes in this book call for, simply reduce the amount of water when they are placed in the blender, so that the water just slightly covers the cashews. Makes about 2 1/4 cups thick cream or 3 1/2 cups regular cream

Prep time: 10 minutes, plus soaking overnight.

VEGAN RANCH DRESSING 

2 Cups of (Blue cap) Veganaise

Chop Fresh Dill, Parsley (about a hand full of each),

Shave 2 or 3 carrots and then cut them up into a dice 

about 1 teaspoon  

add 1 teaspoon garlic powder 

1 teaspoon of onion powder then squeeze one lemon and mix it up. (I always buy 2 jars because you can use one as MAYO and one as Ranch dressing, it stays nice if you make it and you can just leave it in the jar.

A life change. 

I have always picked up on an underlying theme in Ellen Degeneres' life. Ellen has been very open to her vegan lifestyle, in how it helps her to succeed in being "her best version of herself."  After admiring from afar about her "veganism" the vegan lifestyle has been popping up everywhere around me. It was no coincidence that Oprah Winfrey had an AMAZING episode featuring the Vegan Lifestyle and how you can still ENJOY FOOD as well as satisfy cravings for your EDULGENT and BUTTERY tasting delights. 

I mean lest be honest, when Paula Deen whips up a chicken pot pie, and melts a stick of butter into her creamy alfrado sauce, it sends me into a frenzy and I want to cook and eat EVERYTHING on her show.  After spending several years rocking out the kitchen, from my FAMOUS TRUFFLE MAC-N-CHEESE  to the most FINGER LICKING NON-VEGAN Spincah-n-artichoke DIP. I will post more recipes, but the point of this blog today, is that I KNOW how delicious I want to eat. But lest also be honest, being fat DOESNT feel good! Wanting to eat flavorful food, and having "quality of life" was important too! And INDULGING like I was on a weekly basis, had started to catch up to me.... Well FUCK YOU FAT GRAMS, and yucky rice cakes, I found the secret! THE ULTIMATE diet! You can eat all the flavors you LOVE, you just have to learn the way.... 

The Vegan Lifestyle is not for everyone, and I respect that. BUT your just most likely ignorant to all of the AMAZING flavors you can get if you mix together SIMPLE ingredients!!! 

The other day I was talking to my BFF Aubrey O'day who happens to have her own reality show on OXYGEN, airing MARCH 7th right after Bad Girls Club called ALL ABOUT AUBREY. TUNE IN! Maybe you will see her and I her "G-hub" talk about it on the show?!  I was teaching Aubrey how you can still eat Onion Dip with carrots, and the DAIRY FREE version with TONS less calories and fat, because of Tofutti SOUR CREAM mixed with Lipton Onion Soup mix and you are in HEAVEN.... ask AUBREY herself!  

I have removed all animal products from my diet. My digestion has become balanced! I have lost lots of weight, and my energy level has gone up! Lets be honest, if I get my ass to the gym every day, things will be EVEN BETTER, but in the mean time making vegan choices in my diet, has had the most POSITIVE effect on my life EVER. 

If you are interested in more of my recipes, I will post them! Stay tuned and see more info below. 

Also my favorite thing in the world is my "Bacon "Chicken" "Cheddar" "Ranch" wrap. Its like the best thing EVER!  

My top ten favorite VEGAN substitutes are  Daiya Vegan Cheese Substitute Veganaise Morning Star Farms Chicken Pattys (only for the breaded cutlet taste) Whole Foods Brand VEGAN chocolate chip cookies! Almond Breeze dairy free MILK which in the vanilla flavor is 100 times better than MILK from an animal. Cashew Cream Morning Star Farms animal free BACON strips (on a grilled "cheese" to die for! Add some Veganaise too!) Ranch Dressing 

3am

Because Im an asshole.... Sometimes I think Im Rob Thomas

This is why you cant give me a microphone after 5 beers!




and for all of you fools who like unplugged...

NYC EARTHQUAKE

PLEASE HELP! NYC NEEDS YOU!

Sponge?!

Just when you think youve had enough laughter....

POP.

Power of the pussy...
REALLY this is the most entertaining commercial I have ever seen! IM dying!

GAY HOARDING!

This is AMAZING! I think Tori Spelling REALLY is Queen of the gays right now for this reason alone!

LASHING OUT...

OK, So I know you girls who read my blog, like when I do beauty tips. TONIGHT LISTEN UP!!

Look what I just got! I'm apart of @JaMaalBuster's #TheLashTakeOva! #LashBarbieNation http://lockerz.com/s/122139476

I am known for my A-listers lashes! One thing my girls are KNOWN for are their lashes! If you want lashes that look like Eva Longoria, or Beyonce, I have the tip for you! go to Jamaalbuster.com

JaMaal Buster makes the BEST false lashes out there!
Please let me add the best part about them: YOU CAN USE A FOOLPROOF TOOL!  This guy has thought of it all! Now you can do your own lashes at home!! Trust me, its a MUST HAVE!

My personal favorite is DADDY's LITTLE GIRL

MAC-Sterical

THIS IS MAC-Sterical *(yes, I just made that word up)

My soul mate

People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that's what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.

A true soul mate is probably the most important person you'll ever meet, because they tear down your walls and smack you awake. A soul mate's purpose is to shake you up, tear apart your ego a little bit, show you your obstacles and addictions, break your heart open so new light can get in, make you so desperate and out of control that you have to transform your life, then introduce you to your spiritual master.

An emotional thank you

An emotional thank you...

This will be my first, and hopefully last partially “debbie- downer” blog post ever.  I think its because, for the first time in my life I have experienced love and heartbreak. Growing up gay, and in the closet until I was 21 years old, I was never really in serious or long term relationships as a teenager. My heart didn’t have the test runs, that heterosexual boys and girls go through. I had just started REALLY dating, and having feelings using my heart muscle when I was in college. However, I never experienced true love until I met my last boyfriend 2 years ago. I have had relationships, and I have met some amazing men, and I have certainly met people who have left their mark on my life! That being said, I have never met anyone who I was whole heartedly head over heels in love with until my last relationship. 

Its so phenomenal to know you are able to fall in love. Once your heart has that feeling you and you know you are able to be IN LOVE, as well as have somebody love you in return, its literally like magic. The world has meaning like its never had and bliss seems like it will be everlasting! I am truly blessed to have experienced true love. What blows my mind is how hard it is to make a relationship work...

Lets be honest, none of us are “NORMAL” and we all have our own individual “demons”  and idiosyncrasies. Mine are happens to be that I am super OCD, and I have a hard time letting go of control. I also have a super stubborn trait that I just cant shake, and once something upsets me its not easy for me to let it go. But the one thing that will forever be my flaw, is my level of sensitivity. I can cry from an episode of Oprah, or from a commercial about restless leg syndrome. 

For those of you you have followed my twitter you have seen my tweet my feelings.  I have clearly been through one the most beautiful relationship one could even wish for and I have even made youtube video’s about being in love, and never letting that love die! So what blows my mind is how happiness  can change so quickly, and how love can suddenly turn into the most painful feeling I have ever had. Now being broken up with the man who will always be the greatest love of my life, I feel something has really tested my faith. It has given me pains in parts of my heart I didnt even know existed, and it has made me think things about love and life that are so negative and dramatic. But what I keep reminding myself is that my last relationship gave me the best 2 years of my life. Being loved that way, and knowing I have the ability to love, is one of the most special things I personally have ever experienced. So for that, I must feel blessed and thankful. 

One of the other things I want to say is that I actually understand WHY people tweet their feelings! Social media has actually been like a sounding board for me in so many ways! But the best part about it, is having the “electronic touch” from my twitter followers, and facebook friends. As creepy as that may sound, Its true. I have been touched by so many people from all over the world, that I have never even met on a face to face basis! Just knowing that someone is listening to me, and then responding with enlightenment, or just a quick note about them caring or understanding, has really helped me get through a hard time! And while I am a long way from recovered,  I do want to say thank you. Thank you to all of the people who “electronically touch me”! 

BRAVO!

Check out on Watch What Happens LIVE after show!
My new client Sonja Morgan gives me a shout out because a caller said they LOVED HER MAKEUP! at 3:30mins.

Hysterurbing

Hysterurbing: (noun) A feeling of hysteria while being disturbed. Example: This video

(Thank you Tell Carlson for this gem)

When I was Young

My momma told me when I was young "we are all born super stars" she pulled my hair up, put my lipstick on, in the glass of her boudoir!

This might be the cutest video I have ever seen. WOW.

Just A Kiss

THIS IS SOOOO AMAZING!
I love being inspired!

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

Loving Acapella

I LOVE this version of Lady Gaga's Born this way! Its Acapella and truly breath taking!

what do you think!?

Eva Longoria Get The LOOK

Yesterday I was honored to do Eva Longoria's makeup.
She was attending an event here in nyc. Eva is VERY sweet and has the most naturally BEAUTIFUL look. Her skin is flawless and her lashes are SO LONG and full. Now I see why she has a lash contract with Loreal.

To get the look gave to Eva Longora you will need these products.

Keihls ultra facial moisturizer.  This is a great base for makeup and I use this under all of my clients foundation to achieve a natural glow.

Dior Crystal Nude Matte skin protector. This is a great makeup primer that LOCKs in moisture and holds makeup on all day! its AMAZING

Bobbi Brown Skin Foundation with SPF 15 I use 2 colors one for the highlight areas of the face and one shade deeper for the contour. THIS is my favorite foundation.

Bobbi Brown Corrector in BISQUE You may need to get a lighter or deeper shade to use under your eyes to CANCEL out dark circles, but Bisque is most universal and is a MIRACLE worker!

Bobbi Brown Tinted Eye Brightner This is one of my favorite Eye Shadow Base products. I used it ALL around the eye and on the lid to prime and brighten the eye for shadow and concealer! Its lightweight and the colors are AMAZING


Dior Skin Nude Natural Glow Fresh Powder Makeup THIS is what I use to set my foundation application with a powder brush. I use this on the cheek contour and forehead as well as the neck and around the nose. It gives your skin a perfect "matte glow" while SEALING in makeup. ( I love this makeup by itself all over the face with a powder brush for less coverage and a very flawless natural look)


Dior 5 Shadow Pallet in Rosy Tan #754 I use the top right deepest color from lash to crease and blend out the crease with the bottom left color.
Then I use Bobbi Brown Long Wear eye gel in BLACK in the lash line. BE SURE to apply it in the inner pink part of the top and bottom of the lash line with a flat or angle liner brush. ALL AROUND THE EYE.

I then blend the bottom last out with the bottom left color of the Dior shadow pallet (Rosy Tan 754)

I coated the lashes twice with Loreal Collagene Mascara top and bottom.

To contour Eva's Cheeks I used  Dior Bronze Matte Sunshine and then re-defined the deeper part of the cheek with  Bobbi Brown Matte Bronzer in Natural

Under the eyes to set the concealer I then use Laura Mercier secret camouflage setting powder for under eye.

My favorite eyebrow pencil Dior Styler ultra fine universal pencil was then used to define Eva's already perfect brow shape!

Eva's Blus was Dior Blush in Rose Diamond

On the Lips, I used MAC lip liner in Subculture. This is my FAVORITE nude lip liner.
And finally topped off Eva's Lips in Dior Addict Ultra Gloss in Apricot Cloche #436

I always recommend to use a MAC blot powder in your shade around the NOSE, Under the chin, and T-zone for matte sin in the RIGHT places!

BEST OF REGINA GEORGE

WHO DOESN'T LOVE REGINA GEORGE...
As my friend josh says "im watching this over and over for life inspiration"

Mean Girls (2004)

Regina: Boo, you whore. 
Regina: Get in loser, we're going shopping. 
Regina: Ma'am, do you have this in the next size up? 
Regina George: She thinks she's gonna have a party and not invite me? Who does she think she is? 
Regina George: I like *invented* her, you know what I mean? 
Regina: She's so pathetic. Let me tell you something about Janis Ian. We were best friends in middle school. I know, right? It's so embarrassing. I don't even... Whatever. So then in eighth grade, I started going out with my first boyfriend Kyle who was totally gorgeous but then he moved to Indiana, and Janis was like, weirdly jealous of him. Like, if I would blow her off to hang out with Kyle, she'd be like, "Why didn't you call me back?" And I'd be like, "Why are you so obsessed with me?" So then, for my birthday party, which was an all-girls pool party, I was like, "Janis, I can't invite you, because I think you're lesbian." I mean I couldn't have a lesbian at my party. There were gonna be girls there in their *bathing suits*. I mean, right? She was a LESBIAN. So then her mom called my mom and started yelling at her, it was so retarded. And then she dropped out of school because no one would talk to her, and she came back in the fall for high school, all of her hair was cut off and she was totally weird, and now I guess she's on crack. 
Regina: I know, right? 

Shane Oman: Why are you eating a Kalteen bar? 
Regina: I'm starving. 
Regina: What? 
Shane Oman: They make you gain weight like crazy. 
Regina: Motherf - 
[she spits out the bite of the bar that she was chewing, and then she lets out a high-pitched scream] 
Regina: Aaaaaaaah! 
Regina: I'm wearing a spinal halo. 
Cady: Look, I'm really sorry about the bus. I feel like it's all my fault. 
Regina: Stopping making this about you. I'm the one that got hit by the bus. 
Cady: I'm really sorry about all the other stuff too. 
Regina: Okay, I'm going to forgive you because I'm a very Zen person... and I'm on a lot of pain medication right now. 
Cady: [Cady smiles] 
Regina: You know Aaron really does like you. He's always talking about how unusual you are and it really pissed me off. Like this one time, I got this really expensive doll house from Germany, but I never played with it. So my mom wanted to give it to my cousin. But even though I didn't want it... 
Cady: You begged your mom to let you keep it? 
Regina: No. I threw it down the stairs. 
[they giggle] 
Regina: I didn't want anyone else to have it. But that's just me. 
Mrs. George: Regina! There about to announce the queen. 
[sees Cady] 
Mrs. George: Hello. 
Regina: Can you believe my f-ing mom is here? 
Regina: [they giggle] 
Regina: Bye. 
[waves] 

Cady: [after humiliating Regina] Wait Regina, I didn't mean for this to happen! 
Regina: To find out that everyone hates me? I don't care! 
Cady: Wait Regina, just listen! 
Regina: No! Do you know what everyone says about you behind your back? Hmm? They say that you're a homeschooled jungle freak, that's a less hot version of me! Yeah, so don't try to act so innocent! You can take that fake apology, and shove it right up your hairy c... 
[Regina gets hit by a bus] 

[after learning Cady is home-schooled] 
Regina: But you're, like, really pretty. 
Cady: Thank you. 
Regina: So you agree? 
Cady: What? 
Regina: You think you're really pretty? 
Cady: Oh... I don't know 

Regina: Oh my God, I love your skirt! Where did you get it? 
Lea Edwards: It was my mom's in the '80s. 
Regina: Vintage, so adorable. 
Lea Edwards: Thanks. 
Regina: [after girl walks away] That is the ugliest f-ing skirt I've ever seen. 

Regina: I know she's kind of socially retarded and weird, but she's my friend... so, just promise me you won't make fun of her! 

Regina: Why don't I know you? 
Cady: I'm new. I just moved here from Africa. 
Regina: What? 
Cady: I used to be home-schooled. 
Regina: Wait... what? 
Cady: My mom taught me at home... 
Regina: No, I know what home-school is, I'm not retarded! So you've actually never been to a real school before? Shut up! Shut up! 
Cady: I didn't say anything. 

Gretchen: That is so fetch! 
Regina: Gretchen, stop trying to make fetch happen! It's not going to happen! 

Gretchen: Regina, we have to talk to you. 
Regina: Is butter a carb? 
Cady: [Rudely] YES. 
Gretchen: Regina, you're wearing sweatpants. It's Monday. 
Regina: So...? 
Karen: So that's against the rules, and you can't sit with us. 
Regina: Whatever. Those rules aren't real. 
Karen: They were real that day I wore a vest! 
Regina: Because that vest was disgusting! 
Gretchen: You can't sit with us! 
Regina: [pause] These sweatpants are all that fits me right now. 
Regina: [after being ignored] Fine! You can walk home, bitches. 

Regina George: Wedell on South Boulevard. 
Gretchen: Caller ID 
Regina George: Not when you connect from information. 
Taylor Wedell's Mom: Hello? 
Regina George: Hello, may I please talk to Taylor Wedell? 
Taylor Wedell's Mom: She's not home yet who's calling? 
Regina George: This is Susan from Planned Parenthood, I have her test results. If you could have her call me as soon as she can. It's urgent, Thank You. 
[Taylor Wedell's mom faints] 
Regina George: She's not going out with anyone. 

Cady: So, are you gonna send any candy canes? 
Regina: No. I don't send them, I just get them. So you better send me one, byotch. 

Regina George: 120 calories and 48 calories from fat. What percent is that? 
Gretchen: Uh, 48 into 120? 
Regina George: I'm only eating foods with less than 30 percent calories from fat. 
Cady: It's 40 percent. Well 48 over 120 equals X over 100 and then you cross multiply and get the value of X. 
Regina George: Whatever, I'm getting cheese fries. 

Regina George: Why do you wear your hair like that? Your hair looks so sexy pushed back. Cady, will you please tell him his hair looks sexy pushed back? 

Gretchen: Growing up female in this world is not easy. In China, baby girls are routinely put up for adoption. And in parts of Africa, women are still made to live in tents during the time of their menses. 
Karen: Ew! 
Gretchen: And even in fancy countries like the United States and England, seven out of ten girls have a negative body image. 
Regina George: Who cares? Six of those girls are right! 

Regina George: It's called the South Beach Fat Flush and all you drink is cranberry juice for 72 hours. 
Aaron Samuels: Lemme see that... this isn't even cranberry juice, it's cranberry juice cocktail. It's all sugar. 
Regina George: I wanna lose three pounds. 
Karen: Oh my God, you're so skinny! 
Regina George: Shut up. 

Regina: Do you know what people say about you? They say you are homeschooled jungle freak who's a less hot version of me. So don't try to act all innocent. You can take that fake apology and shove it straight up your hairy little... 
[gets hit by a schoolbus]