Im going home! To the place where I belong!

Living in the United States I have been taking for granted some major things. Showers, the ability to leave your house without being attacked by wild animals, food & water that doesn't make you explode from both ends simultaneously, a home with a door man, and many other things... 

this is what lies outside the hotel rooms only feet away from my door!

I was so happy to  check out of the “resort” where some tourists spend thousands of dollars to enjoy nature/ animals, culture, and life beyond their realm. Even with Aunt Helen to entertain me, staying in JoBerg was NOT going to happen. Perhaps I will never have thick enough skin to travel to third world countries. Perhaps I will never have the money or opportunity to see the world, with the “bubble of luxury” around me enough to enjoy it. When I get home I will try NOT to take things for granted.

After the hotel manager to helped me flee the resort today with Beth, Drew, and my THE BIG HAND.

I arrived at the airport with NO ticket home. Originally I was supposed to depart November 1st.  Leaping out of the car service, Beth & Drew proceeded to Cape Town. I couldn’t handle any more AFRICA. I placed my bags on a trolly with the luggage porter, I proceeded to the ticket counter. IT WAS JUST ME AND MY HAND AGAIN!! Except this time there was a 55 pound luggage tagging along. When I reached the ticket counter I began pleading with the sales agent to put me on the next plane out to NYC. “A FAMILY MEMBER IS ILL IN THE US, AND THEY MAY PASS AWAY SOON!!” I pleaded. “Please sir, I called the travel agent yesterday and they told me I must change my ticket at the airport.” (the second part was true I was the one about to pass away from an anxiety attack). “I only have 100 rand (17$) left and I had to spend one thousand US dollars on the 3 nights left that I will not be refunded at the hotel. If you don’t help me I will have to sleep in the airport with my luggage and this big hand I purchased in Joberg.” He explained it would be $1350.00 USD to change my ticket today. As the tears naturally welled up in my eyes, I dramatically pulled out the last 100 rand I’d retrieved from the ATM  & a Dior lip gloss (I always carry extra make up when traveling for reasons like this). I said “PLEASE! I will give you the rest of my money, and this very expensive & fancy make up, you must have a girlfriend to give it to! It is almost Christmas!” The man looked at me as if I had just tried to give him Paris Hilton’s chihuahua. He then asked me “Sir how much was that thing you bought? WHAT IS IT?” I lied and told him $500 rand and said it was just a stool made of metal. Again he looked at me like I was crazy & on drugs, and essentially I was. “OK” he said, “I will give you your ticket for just the change fee, $300 USD. But it will only be an economy seat in the back of the plane.” I looked at him as if he had just given me 70% off at the TOM FORD boutique on my entire purchase. “THANK YOU SO MUCH SIR, YOU HAVE CHANGED MY LIFE”.... As I walked to the check in line, and my luggage assistant still in toe, I grabbed 20 singles out of my pocket to tip him. The check in attendant saw the pass off and said “WOW, THAT WAS NICE”. I explained to her it was only singles, but 20 of them and I would be happy to supply her with a crisp $20.00 bill and whipped out a tarte mascara from my stash. “This mascara will change your life! It is lash growing (total bullshit) and it is $60.00 in the USA!” (also total bullshit) she said “Well sir, business class is full, but I can move you to the exit row with extra leg room at the front of the plane. This seat usually will cost 1,500 Rand more”. “DEAL” I screamed, and I proceeded thank her and explain what my big bubble wrapped hand was and why she must check it like a golf bag, and NOT to charge me an extra fee.

Sign #1 this is going to be a rough trip.

Now I sit loptarded in my my economy class seat 3 rows behind the brave mother, for now sleeping baby, and a somewhat body odor reeking man. All of the things I hate the most! If God hasnt tried to make me greatful for something this trip, I don't know what has! This trip has taught me several things.

I realized this week how lucky I actually was when I was bitching and moaning over my hotel in the middle of one of the poorest AIDS stricken countries in the world. Not having a nice enough suite for me to stay in should have been the least of my worries. Customer service is something these people do not know because they have no luxury at all. What I consider luxury, these human beings who have the same hearts, souls, skin and blood, do not even comprehend. In most parts of South Arica, there was a level of poverty that I had never been affected by. I have had to endure what I consider torture in what these people consider a 4star hotel. I am lucky, I am blessed, and I needed to actually see that through experience. Don’t get me wrong, I have always known I am somewhat privileged, but to the extent that I am, it has taken until just now, for me to open my eyes fully.

this was HALF way point in my journey. 8.5 hours and 4 thousand miles.

#1 I am not cut out to travel unless it is in my contract upon arrival that there are suites at the hotel or accommodations no less than a sheraton 4star US STANDARD

#2 I live in a wonderful country and I am blessed to have nice things, and I want them around me at all times.

#3 DO NOT GET ON A FLIGHT over 4 hours unless it is business class or first class seat.

#4 I will start doing more charity work. While I may not want to endure these conditions, I can still help others who must.

OH! And one more thing, I must admit, I had my suitcase wrapped like a deli sandwich. It is going to be one of the most mortifying things I have ever done retrieving it from baggage claim. I may as well start clapping when this plane lands. Thats the kid of person I feel like right now.